Ending Something Great, Starting Something Great

A few weeks ago, I was really beginning to wonder if this time of nursing my littlest one might just extend right on into toddlerhood. Whereas both boys had stopped nursing around 12-13 months, she was still nursing 4-6 times a day at that age. Well, here we are at 14 months, and she's weaning.

THE END OF SOMETHING GREAT
This time of weaning is always a hard time for me, and I'm not an emotional person. After months of holding those babies close, looking into their big, beautiful eyes, and falling in love with this new little person in our lives, it is hard to give up that special time. Some of it is knowing that they'll never lay that still and content again in my lap that consistently again. Some of it is knowing that they'll never again get sustenance from me in quite the same way. Some of it is an acknowledgement that this little person is growing up. And, let's face it, some of it is probably hormones...

I'm just going to really miss this time with my beautiful daughter. Yes, I know I can still hug her and hold her and look into her eyes- but it's not going to be the same. Yes, much of it will be SO much better... but there is just something so stinkin special about having a precious one in your arms, so dependent on you and desperate for you. Anyway, I'm REALLY going to miss this time with her. I'm about to cry as I'm writing this. Letting this special time go (as always) is a difficult thing. And the thing is, she'd rather not wean-- she still greatly enjoys and and desires to nurse. That makes this time all the more difficult. Why am I weaning her then? Well, that leads me to my next piece of news:

THE START OF SOMETHING GREAT
We're expecting another little precious one. Yes, it's true- and we're SO excited!!! ;) What fun to be used by God to create new life! What fun to think of the relationships this little one will have and the way he or she will be used by God to bring others into relationship with Him! What fun to start this new adventure overseas with a stowaway that was known only to God!

We're so thrilled! And for all of you who are curious, we're about 5-6 weeks along, so I believe our due date is about March 30, and no, I haven't seen a doctor yet, but I hope to within the next few weeks. Lord willing and the creek don't rise, this baby will be about 22 months younger than our youngest, which means next summer, we will have a 6-year-old boy, a 4-year-old boy, a 2-year-old girl, and a newborn????. What a huge treasure of blessings from God!

But THAT'S why my sweet daughter must wean. Yes, I have read all the literature- that many women choose to continue nursing long after they are expecting another one... however, I've had two miscarriages, both about two years ago, one of which I believe was caused by the uterine contractions from breastfeeding. I am not hurrying her to stop, but neither am I going to risk losing this precious little life when my daughter is already at a healthy age for weaning. So it is with sadness and with great joy that I write this post- about the end of something great (nursing my little precious girl), and the start of something great (getting to meet a new little person next Spring).